I am blessed with awesome kids!

Disclaimer:  I am not trying to say your kids are anything by posting this.  It is not a "my kid is awesome and yours are not" kind of post.  Please don't be offended.

With that being said, I want to say the reason for this post is sometimes I need to repeat this to myself, sometimes many times a day.  I want this post to look back on when I get to a really "tough" day.

Trust me when I say there are days when Noah simply will not listen to one thing I say and he is insistent on running around naked, peeing on everything in sight and screaming while Emilee screams and cries along in unison.  And of course, that's the day I need to get errands ran, chores done, and about a million other things to do.  I end the day thinking I have 2 demon children that I will never be able to control.  Either that or I feel like I've failed as a mom.

BUT, those days don't happen that often.  And there are so many good things that both my kids do, I just have to feel blessed by them.  Especially after what happened in Newtown, CT.

Let me start with Noah.  His potty training has come leaps and bounds from where we started.  He consistently tells us when he has to go pee and poop.  Last week I even caught him getting up from naptime, going pee, flushing, washing hands, etc all by himself.  When I asked what he was doing, he just said all nonchalantly "I had to go potty, mom".  Well, of course he did...LOL.  His language skills are amazing.  He will tell us whole stories of things that happened at daycare or at home, sometimes even something that happened months ago.  He is so smart.  He knows what makes things work and when he doesn't, he is insistent to know how they work.  He is very kind and helpful.  I don't know too many times he has asked to help, but if I ask for help, he's right there.  Whether it's making cookies, cleaning up the dishes, taking care of sister, doing laundry, etc.  Every morning at daycare, he insists on carrying the milk in for Emilee.  He is also very loving.  I can't tell you how many times he kisses his sister in 1 day.  He also always says I"m sorry or Bless You to other people, even those he doesn't know.  I'm amazed at his physical strength and courage.  This is one of the most amazing feats only because Noah is so small, but he has never let that hold him back.  This kid will climb and jump off just about anything.  I'm just in awe of how he'll jump right in with 5 or 6 year olds and the physical things they do.  He is also learning to ride a 2 wheel bike (balance bike) and he can almost do it without using his feet all the time.  He will definitely be ready for a regular pedal bike by next summer.  I know I'm not the only one that thinks these things either.  He is in the 3-4 year old class at school and has been since the beginning of the summer.  He fits right in there doing all the same developmental things as the rest of the kids.  One last thing to mention is his cleanliness.  Most kids his age eat a meal and it looks like half of it ended up on the floor, the other half on their clothes.  Not Noah.  He will eat and if anything drops on the table or clothes, he requests a napkin to clean himself RIGHT AWAY.  As of today, he eats on a regular plate with regular silverware and a regular cup.  By the way, I love that we can just leave the house with him, no preparing by bringing special food, diapers, special silverware, etc.  He's just like a mini-adult.

Now for Emilee.  She isn't quite as old as Noah so I don't feel like there's as much to brag about with her, but I feel confident in saying she will be right behind her brother.  At almost 9 months old, she is a pro at crawling and she is just about ready to start pulling herself all the way up.  But best about her is her temperament.  She is just so content to sit and watch everything that goes on around her.  When I put her down for naps or bedtime, most of the time I just lay her in her crib, wide awake.  She may toss and turn or crawl around for a bit, but then she'll fall asleep.  She loves her solid food, but definitely enjoys the more solid/whole foods vs purees.  We've been a lot more lax about the foods we've been giving to her especialy after I've read some articles about how waiting 4 days between foods and waiting to give certain foods until certain ages isn't necessarily right for most kids, in fact, doing just the opposite can help them like a wider variety of foods.  So just about anything we eat at dinner, she gets in small bites.  She is really started to like her toys and be able to push buttons and see the reaction now too.  She's definitely starting that "mental learning" phase and it seems like once that starts, it won't stop for a little while (since Noah is still in that phase).

Overall, I'm so happy and blessed with my 2 kids.  Some days are so overwhelming, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Sickness

Sickness took the Porter household last week.  It all started on Sunday.  Noah woke up several times in the night, coughing and saying he didn't feel good.  Then around 4am, he started throwing up.  On dad, to be specific.  He continued throwing up all day long and wasn't eating anything.  He couldn't even keep water down.  I went to the store and got some Pedialyte but of course, he refused to drink it.  At least he was drinking water pretty heavily. 

We had to email our Sunday School director and inform her that we wouldn't be teaching that morning.  Emilee seemed fine, but later she also developed some diarrehea.  Poor kids. 

At least Noah seemed to be making it to the potty and trash can most times. 

And then Monday he seemed better.  Started eating more and no vomiting.  So we thought "great, we could send them back to daycare on Tuesday".  Monday night, I started feeling quesy so I went to bed and an hour later, woke up vomiting.  I tried so hard to avoid it, but I guess I was destined to have it.  I threw up several times until my stomach was in so much pain.  I'm serious when I say the pain was worse than labor pains. 

I took some Tylenol and thankfully, I didn't throw it up and I finally fell asleep around 4 am.  I clearly was not going to work.  When the kids got up, Noah threw up again.  That meant he wasn't going to school.  So we decided David was going to take the day off to take care of me and Noah.  About an hour later, he threw up.

We ended up calling David's mom and my dad to come help since it's really hard to take care of 2 young ones when you yourself are sick.  David and I both had fevers (the kids just had elevated temps, never a fever).  The next day, Noah and David were fine to go back to normal activity.  I probably could have but I took advantage and took one more day, which was actually my first PTO day. 

I ended up going back to work Thursday and Friday and now I am fine.  Noah and Emilee both still have these chronic runny noses.  Not sure if that is related to whatever virus they had or just the weather???  Noah also complains about a tummy ache a couple times a day.  I'm convinced that he is just using that as an excuse for attention.

Hopefully we all stay healthy through the Holidays and then next year.  I have to work Mon, Wed, and Fri this week and then both David and I are off through the new year.  Next year, I will start working 5 days a week, although only 40 hours at first.  The plan going forward is to work full-time (either 40 or 55 hours in busy season) except for the summer (Memorial Day to Labor Day).  Then I'll work 3 days a week. 

Potty Training

I plan to write a general update post on both kids very soon, but I want to get this post out there now because it's the freshest in my mind to write about.

I want to explain exactly why we chose the method we did, how we made it work for us, and the progress Noah has made (or is still making).

It's hard to say when exactly we started potty training.  Around 18 months, we set out a potty upstairs.  Occasionally he would sit on it just for fun, but nothing ever happened.  Then around 2 years old, he started to learn the association between the potty and actually going pee-pee.  But by no means was he ready for potty training, or at least we thought.  He would ask to go when we were in restaurants and sometimes when we were getting ready for bed but otherwise, he was still wearing a diaper and not really telling us when he needed to go or when he'd just gone.  Looking back on it, we should have started potty training then, he was much more cooperative than he was even just a short 3 months later.

We were pretty insistent that we were not going to potty train Noah and then Emilee be born and all be lost.  So we waited.  We really thought he was ready (and honestly he probably was) a few weeks after Emilee was born so we took advantage of us both being home during the week.  Our method to start with was what others had told us to do: take him to the potty a bunch of times and rewards.  This failed miserably by the 2nd day.  It was a fight everytime to get him to go to the potty, sometimes he went and sometimes he didn't.  Could have cared less about a reward.  Plus it was more like we were training ourselves, not Noah.  To me, potty training or learning is about learning to recognize urges and when its time to go to the potty.  It was really hard on us especially with a newborn, so we quit and said we would just wait until he was ready, whenever that would be.

Jump forward a few month (I think this was around July 2012).  He was asking more and more to go potty even though I think it was still a novelty thing, but more important he would tell us when he had just pooped, so there was definitely more awareness going on.  I was becoming more convinced that he was ready and if we waited any longer (for what, I don't know), we would miss the window.  Little did I know, I think we'd already missed the window when we should have been doing this closer to when he was 2.  So I started doing research on what to do.  I wanted to be more prepared this time.

We chose the 3-day potty training method.  It was recommended by a friend.  I liked it because there was no taking him to the potty a bunch of times.  No fighting with him.  If he wet himself, he wet himself.  And it was all about actually teaching him to recognize when he needed to go and take care of business.  I'm not against other parents wanting to use the "time" method.  If that's what works for their kids, then great.  And i will admit there are still times when we encourage him to use it, like when we are headed out the door or I know there are no potties around.

Basically the method has you "throw" out his diapers in a big celebration on the beginning of the first day.  Then you just remind them to tell you when they need to go, not ask.  They will have lots of accidents.  But the key is catching them in the act and taking them to the potty to finish.  And then, lots of rewards and positive reinforcement.  You are supposed to do this for nap and nighttime as well, no diapers, pull-ups, etc.  Just underwear.  By the 3rd day, they are supposed to be able to then tell you when they need to go.  You are also supposed to spend all 3 days at home with them, giving them lots of attention.

We mostly did all of that.  All underwear, no pullups or diapers.  He had lots of accidents on Sat and Sun and we thought we were getting nowhere!!!!  I was so ready to pull the plug and quit again but I said I just didn't to wait out the 3rd day.  Day 3 was at daycare.  I know, he was supposed to be at home, but I couldn't take off work and it just couldn't work that way, so we took our chances.  Told the daycare what our plan was, left a bazillion pairs of backup clothes and walked out the door with our fingers crossed.  All day long I thought about him and envisioned all the laundry I would be doing that night and how I couldn't wait to just get him back in diapers the next day. 

I went in to go get him and the first thing I noticed was a paper in his mailbox that said "Congrats for using the potty!".  A little confused, maybe they give that to all the kids when they start trying.  Went in and talked to his teacher and was SHOCKED to find out he only had maybe 1 accident all day.  More surprising, he went most of the times they took potty breaks and he even asked to go a couple times.  I wish you had seen my face that moment.  Well of course I couldn't stop potty training now, not now that I'd seen some progress. 

A few weeks later, he was still doing OK.  I would not say potty trained in any manner since he was still having 1-2 accidents a day.  We did switch to pull-ups at nap and nighttime though.  He just wasn't waking up at all and I felt bad that he was sleeping in his pee all night long.  We took a vacation to Branson and I was so afraid of the massive amounts of dirty laundry we would create (especially considering he doesn't have enough clothes to go through 2-3 changes a day for a whole week without doing laundry).  Maybe it was the attention he got all week and just being in a new environment (David read or heard a theory that a vacation while potty training is very helpful because it "resets" their brain by being in a new environment with a new schedule), but it did REALLY well.  VERY few accidents, if any.  I even remember going to the Dixie Stampede and our seats were really far from the bathrooms and he was still asking and having no accidents.  Although I will say it was hilarious when David took him to the bathroom and brought him back out in no pants or underwear.  He didn't take the bag with him to change him and I'd assumed he must have had an accident.  When he finally got back with Noah clothed, it turns out the toilet overflowed and got all over his clothes.  Gross, but so funny!

Since then over the next 5 months or so, we've been making progress.  We had about a week or so of regression where he was peeing in his pants and did not care at all, but overall we've been moving forward in potty training.  Little did I think potty training was actually a year long process!!!!  I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that Noah's failures in potty training are related to the phase of life he's in, which is worthy of a blog post all on its own. 

I can tell you that this last week has been amazing.  He's been doing really well asking to go potty everytime, even when he has to poop.  He's been good at daycare, home, out, church or even when he's with someone else.  I hope and pray we've really turned a corner and are just about there.  He does still wear a pull-up at night.  We went through a month or two where he was getting up at night, I think to go potty but we never really tried to night train him yet.  The plan is to try again at the end of the year when we have some time off.  We have been working with him to potty train during naptime.  And for now, it's about 50% wet and 50% dry so we are still working with that.

If I had to do this over again, I would have started earlier, like when he was 2 instead of waiting for him to be in this "testing his limits" phase.  Sometimes he will literally rip his pants off and use his "hose" as a weapon to assert his independence by peeing all over everything.  Last night he even stood over his sister and pretended like he was going to pee on her.  He didn't but it's things like that that make me think if we had really fully trained him earlier, he wouldn't act like this, at least not with potty training.  I think one thing that has helped that is getting punished or time-outs for having accidents.  Not all accidents.  We are very careful to recognize true, honest accidents that he just needs love and reassurance and the accidents were he knew exactly what he was doing and he did it for attention. 

I think the best advice is to relax.  I'm a very clean and controlling mom (I know it), so it's hard to potty train since it seems like it's so out of my control.  But even when he was accidents (true accidents), you just clean it up and go, don't make a big deal out of it.

Ok, so that was a novel and you deserve a cookie if you made it to the end.  Any other tips you'd like to share with me would be great.  Like I've said before, I'm not an expert and always love advice!  I also pray and am convinced that Emilee will be worlds easier to potty train.  She hates wet diapers so convincing her to pee like a lady will be no problem at all.  Plus now I've been through one so I feel way more confident to do it again.

Return to blogging

I apologize for waiting this long to come back to blogging.  Honestly, I just didn't have time with 2 little ones  and a part-time job.  But I want to make time.  I'm not even sure how many people still read this blog, but even if it's just for me to look back on months and years down the line, then it's worth it.  I can't tell you how many times in the last couple months, I've thought "I wonder what we did with Noah" and then came back here to read my thoughts on it.  Not to mention I haven't updated Emilee's baby book since Month 2 (eeeek!).

My goals are to post more regularly, at least once a week on updates as well as blog posts about big things happening in our lives or when a topic is just too big in my mind to ignore.  I plan to write about whatever I want so I apologize in advance if what I write is offensive to you or you just highly disagree with me.  But I would love for you to comment and tell me why you think differently.  I love hearing different opinions and I never claim to be 100% right on anything.  I generally analyze everything I do or any decision I make, so chances are I've already thought of what you are saying but I just didn't write it down.

I don't plan to post many pictures.  First, I find it hard to upload them here.  Second, if this blog is just for me, I have plenty of pictures on my phone and computer, I don't need to spend the extra time uploading them here as well.  Lastly, most of my followers are also on facebook and most of my pictures go there. 

Lastly, I added a "Christmas" feel to my blog just to update things, but after Christmas, I plan to make a more "permanent" look to the blog.  Stay tuned!

Emilee Elizabeth's birth story

Emilee’s story begins a few days before her actual birth. Starting Sunday, March 25, 2012 (38w4d), we decided to try natural induction methods to see if we could get labor started on its own. I took a bath, did acupressure points, etc. I did have some contractions but they stopped pretty soon after I stopped the induction techniques. Monday night, we tried again with absolutely no success. Tuesday night, we tried yet again.

This time, I ended up with pretty strong contractions. I started timing them and they were 5 minutes apart and lasted for about 2 hours. I contacted our doula but we weren’t sure it was the real thing yet. So David and I decided if this was real labor, I should get some sleep. I laid down and the next thing I knew, I woke up in the morning and all contractions were gone. Wednesday night, we tried but without the bath and again, they just went away as soon as I stopped.

Wednesday was also when I was officially 39 weeks and I had an OB appointment. I was 3 cm (1 cm progress from the previous week). He seemed convinced that I would be having this baby soon, but I was still undecided. By Thursday I had decided in my mind to stop all natural induction methods and just let labor do its own thing and if still nothing had happened by Sunday, I might try again. Sometime during the day, I had convinced myself that we should try again that night because my doctor wasn’t on call that weekend and if I was going to have a baby before the weekend, that night would be the night to do it.

All day Thursday, March 29, 2012, I had been having the same Braxton-hicks contractions that I’ve had for weeks. No regularity or consistency. I left work at 5pm and was going to go pick up my son from daycare. Before I left I went to the restroom and there was a tiny bit of pink so I got excited that maybe this meant something but could just be a very early labor sign and real labor was still days away. On the drive home, I started to notice that my contractions were coming more often but I could easily breath through them and didn’t even need to stop or anything. I joked at the daycare that I might be in labor, but I really was joking.

When I got home, David had made steaks on the grill and it was a really good meal. Still trying to time my contractions, but I think I was missing the beginning of them and they were still feeling like Braxton-hicks contractions. After dinner, we went on a walk (through our very hilly neighborhood). We even met a neighbor who was about 34 weeks pregnant and we were joking with her about how I might be in labor. This whole time I was texting our doula and trying to decide if this was real labor or not. She had to work that night so she was trying to decide whether to call in as well. She ended up calling in and I started thinking that this wasn’t real labor and she had just called in for nothing and it was all going to end up just like Tuesday night.

At home, I took a shower and then I realized I had lost my mucus plug and was definitely having bloody show. That made me think this was real labor and that I would be having my baby soon, but I was thinking the next day or so based on how light my contractions were. We put our son into bed and made sure our bag was packed. Around 8pm, I called my dad (who would be watching Noah) and told him that we thought we were in real labor but he had time and there was no need to leave yet.

Sometime around 8:30pm, the contractions turned intense. They were to the point where I had to stop and sway during each one. They were coming 2.5 minutes apart at this point which was a little scary that they got that intense and close together that fast. I told the doula to start making her way. We called my dad back and told him to leave. Both my dad and the doula showed up around 9:30pm. We had moved downstairs at this point and unlike Noah’s labor, the best place was actually on the couch. The contractions seemed harder to manage on the couch but I enjoyed being there between contractions more. David was rubbing my feet in between contractions which felt great. The doula suggested getting down on hands and knees but that seemed to hurt just as much as the couch. I was also having some intense pressure down there. The pressure was there even between contractions and the doula thought it might be smart to think about heading to the hospital soon.

I thought she was crazy. There was NO way I was that close to delivering and I didn’t want to labor at the hospital for that long. I had a few more intense contractions where it was getting to the point where it didn’t matter where I was, it hurt and I was having to moan and sway through them. So we all got in the car. The ride to the hospital was horrible! Every bump and turn made me feel like I was having another contraction. And I couldn’t sit on the chair since the pressure in my bottom was so intense.

We arrive at the hospital around 10:30pm. I, of course, had a contraction right as soon as David let me out and I’m sure the people standing outside thought I was crazy or something. I stood there with David and then walked inside and waited at the counter. The lady asked if I need to go upstairs (meaning to Labor and Delivery) and I shook my head. She called and I just stood there, not saying anything. The doula showed up shortly after and I had another contraction with her. Then David showed up. We kept waiting.

I think the intake person at the ER was getting concerned and called back up to L&D several more times. FINALLY, someone came down and I got in the wheelchair. I had a contraction in the elevator which was incredibly painful sitting in the chair. She started wheeling me towards triage and into a room there. The whole time I was thinking “Seriously, I’m going to have a baby, why do we have to mess with the triage room”. I guess finally the nurse thought the same thing and decided to send me to a regular room. On the way to the room, I had another contraction and told her to stop. I guess I was being a little loud and one of the nurses wanted them to move me. Haha.

Finally get into the room and it was about 11pm. I change and crawl onto the bed and they hook me up to the monitors. I still couldn’t sit on my bottom so I was on my side leaning against the side rail. They hooked up my hep lock which I still thought was a little crazy and it hurt worse than the contractions. They called my doctor and told him they thought I was close and he should make his worse. Finally a nurse checks me.

9.5 cm!!! With just a little lip left. I was so happy I was that far along. I was really worried I would only be 4 cm or something and would have to continue laboring this hard for another 10 hours, like with Noah’s labor. Around this time, my sister-in-law, Alicia, showed up. I was so glad she made it. They called my doctor back and told him to hurry. The next contraction I started pushing involuntarily. I couldn’t help it. Luckily my doctor showed up just after that.

They broke down the bed and the doctor started getting dressed. The next contraction I pushed and the head started coming out. Next push, her head crowned and the doctor stopped me because her cord was wrapped around her head twice! Then the third push the rest of her body slipped right out.

After she was out, I had to wait several minutes to have another contraction to delivery the placenta. In the meantime, the doctor learned that the girl next to me was actually my doula and asked her if she would like to deliver the placenta. So finally I had another contraction and pushed and out came the placenta.

Emilee weighed 6lb 11oz and was 20 inches long. I had no tearing. I have recovered a lot faster this time than with my son, although the cramping has been a lot worse. Emilee has been breastfeeding very well although her latch is really shallow, but hopefully she will get better soon.

39 week appt, disappointments, and renewed hope

Wow, what a week!!! So since my 38 week appointment, I've been getting a lot of "pressure". Yeah sure some pressure down there, but mostly peer pressure. "You haven't had the baby yet" "Oh, you're still at work" "When's the baby coming". It goes on and on. Not to mention that between work and church, I'm trying to make last minute preparations for my departure which only reminds me that it could be anyday. That's exciting but also extremely frustrating when I go to bed each night with no labor pains and no baby.

So then finally David and I decided we would try some natural induction methods on Sunday night. Let me explain that this is what put me into labor with my son. I'm also 100% sure that it won't work if my body and the baby just aren't ready. I won't divulge every detail of what our "natural induction methods" are, but basically a bath, accupressure, massage, etc. The result was a few contractions some getting a little painful but basically nothing that lasted. Guess my body just wasn't ready. We tried again Monday with even less luck. Then Tuesday. Did the same routine but added a spicy dinner and by the time I had gotten out of the bathtub, I had 4 REALLY strong contractions. I started to time them while reading and they were consistently 5 minutes apart and I had to stop reading and breath through them.

So we packed our bags. Most of it was already packed, just needed a few last minute items. Then 2 hours later, around 10:30, we both decided I should try and lay down if this was real labor. If this was real labor, then just lying down shouldn't make them go away. Well I fell asleep and while I'm sure I had a few contractions while I was sleeping and even some strong enough to wake me, by morning, there was NOTHING! I couldn't believe how certain I was that this was labor and then nothing??? So very disappointed. David was also pretty bummed.

I'm still not 100% sure what to think. I honestly don't think my induction methods would have made my contractions go for that long if my body wasn't at least a little ready, but then why did they stop? Oh well. Fast forward to my doctor's appointment on Wednesday.

I was 3 cm!!! WOO HOO. So maybe all those contractions were doing something! And the best news ever. My doctor is in fact NOT going to be out of town next week. I guess it didn't line up for his kid's spring break schedules or something, so he isn't going to be in the office on Thursday or Friday but it sounds like he will be on-call all week. Such a relief!!!

So after lots of thinking, I'm just going to rest and relax between now and Sunday. Sunday is Palm Sunday. Noah is going to be performing in the kid's program and David and I's 1st graders will be singing, so it's definitely something we don't want to miss. If I go into labor between now and then, great! If not, then we'll try some of our induction methods again on Sunday. Otherwise, I'm just going to try to enjoy the last few days of pregnancy, get some stuff done around the house, go shopping, and just enjoy myself. I have to stop pressuring myself to have the baby everyday, it just leads to so much disappointment. I know she'll come when she's ready and evidently she must be pretty cozy in there. My biggest fear is going for too long and then worrying that the doctor will start talking induction, but honestly I really don't think I will go past my due date. I just have a feeling!

38 week appt

I had my weekly appointment at the OB's yesterday. We had to wait almost an hour, apparently he was running a little behind. We've never had to wait that long, but oh well. Everything looks good, bp is still the same (right at normal) and weight is up a little from the past weeks but I've definitely gotten my appetite back so that's no surprise. I was still 2 cm and about 75% effaced, so no change from the previous week. That's a little surprising just because I feel like I've had more contractions this past week, but maybe there was a little change and it was just hard to measure from the previous week.

I'm pretty certain she isn't going to be making her arrival this week and I will see my OB again next Wednesday, but we'll see. He's not on-call this weekend, so no going into labor then!

I'm still recovering from my sinus infection. Most of the sinus pressure and coughing has gone away, but if anything the congestion has gotten worse. My nose is so clogged up and just won't clear. It almost feels like my sinus passageways are teeny tiny and just can't open enough to let air go through. It's a really weird "drowning" feeling that I hate. Hopefully that will resolve itself within a day or two. Tomorrow is my last day of antibiotics and then with the recommendation of my OB and doula, I will start probiotics.

37 week appt

I had my 37 week appointment yesterday. Still 2 cm and found out that last week I was also 75% effaced. But as my doctor said "still floating around in there". My belly is measuring right on 37 weeks and my blood pressure and everything else all looked fine. I did lose 2 pounds but with being sick, I think that was to be expected. I found out that I am GBS - which is a huge relief to me because I really didn't want to figure out what to do if I was positive and was instructed to go to the hospital as soon as I was in labor for antibiotics. So no big changes, just keep on being pregnant. And at this point, that is more than fine with me since I'm still sick and really don't want to be in labor while sick. I can say that I think I'm finally getting better. I'm just taking it one day at a time, but I really hope that I can recover quicker than normal.

We are for the most part ready for her to arrive. I want to clean out the cars this weekend and get the bases installed. I also need to pack my hospital bag and get a few last minute things together, but then I'll be ready. Then I just need to focus on work. I'm not really concerned about getting x number of projects done before I leave, but I do want to get things a little more in order before I dump everything on someone else.

Being sick is HORRIBLE!

So I mentioned in my last post that I had a fever on Wednesday and thought I was getting better on Thursday. Well that was the farthest thing from the truth. I ended up having a fever all afternoon/evening Thursday and then Friday I was still feeling really yucky. The sinus pressure was unbearable all day Thursday and Friday. Friday I did think that maybe I was feeling a bit better and went and got Noah from daycare and picked up their coming home shirts, but I was still pretty bad off. Saturday morning I finally went to urgent care. They weren't super helpful but basically told me that I had the flu but that was gone and now I had a sinus infection. They gave me an antibiotic, but told me that it could be a few days before it would start working. And then a bunch of people I've talked to said sinus infections can take weeks to resolve.

Saturday was a tiny bit better and then today also another step better. I think I may actually be on the upswing of all this. Hopefully everyday I get better and by the time Emilee decides to make her arrival, I'm 100%.

We had maternity photos done today. And we have a doula appt this week. After that, I feel fairly confidant that we've done everything we need to do. I have my 37 week appointment this week.

36 week appt

I went for my 36 week appt yesterday. I am about 2 cm dilated. Looking back to Noah's pregnancy, I was also 2 cm at my 36 week appointment, so there really is no indication that I'm going to have the baby any time soon. But it's always good to know my body is making some progress.

He did the GBS strep test and I should get the results back next week. Hoping it comes back negative like the first time around.

Otherwise, nothing too exciting. I technically lost 2 pounds but that's not too surprising with how sick I've been these last few days. Yesterday I had a 102 fever almost all day. Regardless of pregnancy, it sucked being that sick. I do feel slightly better today. Just have a lot of sinus pressure.

We are almost ready for baby. Need to still pack my bags though.

Small Update

I updated my blog picture to one of his 2 year pictures. He's such a cutie!!! I know it's not perfect, but it will do for now and it's better than a 1 year old picture. I plan to do a total blog revamp after I have Emilee and include her picture as well. Patience.

Speaking of Emilee, I'm done being pregnant. I'm trying my very best to enjoy these last few weeks of pregnancy. I really am. But it's so hard. I'm very anxious and ready to just meet her and start our bonding. But I'm also just tired of the normal pregnancy aches and pains. I'm tired of working busy season. I'm tired of everything. I need change. This is probably more my crazy pregnancy hormones, but I've definitely become more irritable with everyone lately. Normally busy season doesn't get on my nerves, but this year, has been a lot tougher. I just don't have the patience to deal with it.

Ok, that's enough ranting. I have my 36 week appointment with my OB on Wednesday and I will update again then.

Bad Mommy!

It's so hard to be a good mommy, especially to a 2 year old. A very stubborn, have-to-have-it-my-way 2 year old. But I'm trying.

This morning, Noah was eating a banana for breakfast and Mommy was eating waffles. Noah decided half way through that he had to have my waffles and didn't want his banana anymore. I said "No, you have to finish your banana first, then I'll give you some waffles". Cue temper tantrum. It was the screaming, banging your head on the floor kind. He then got up, temper seemed to be under control, tears had stopped and said "Mommy, waffles" and I said "No, you have to eat your banana first" and round 2 began. This time he resorted to Daddy and asked him for waffles and he said the same thing. We asked him several times if he wanted his banana and his response everytime was "NO, I don't want it".

This was now more about being consistent and following through even after the tantrums, then about giving him waffles. So finally after much internal debate, he decided it was worth it and ate his banana. Then very nicely asked for waffles. At that point, I had finished, so I popped him in some of his own and we watched the toaster do its work. At this point, he became this giggly, laughing, cute 2 year old that I love. It's amazing how fast their moods change.

In the end, he got his waffle and everyone was happy, including Mommy who was so glad I stood my ground. I hate seeing my little baby cry and be all upset especially when I hold the key to making him happy but I know that if I give in this time, next time, he'll cry even harder the next time to get what he wants. Maybe this makes me a bad mommy but it works for Noah as we've seen it work in other ways in his life. Example - Noah ate almost all his green beans at dinner the other night even though I know it was tough work for him to do (I don't blame him, I'm not a fan either).

Quick Update

I know, I'm terrible at updating. I have been what we can call pretty busy. Here are a few quick updates for now:

* We did get to see Emilee on the 3d ultrasound and she was head down. YAY!!! She has been head down since too.

* Noah turned 2 and is a crazy little toddler. He is just starting potty training and I think he will adjust really well to his new little sister.

* Work has really picked up and I've been doing 55 hours a week. You may think that's crazy but really my work is very flexible and easy so it's not bad at all. I also know that at any time if things get to be too much, I can cut back.

* I'm currently 35 weeks along and doing pretty good. Still seeing the chiropractor on a weekly basis which helps. Need to be more adament about doing my pregnancy exercises.

* My next doctor appointment is March 7 (I'll be 36 weeks) with my normal OB (I've been seeing his partners). I go weekly from there and I believe that will start my internal checks.

Ok, that's it for now. I will try and come back and post updates from our 3D ultrasound and Noah's 2 year pics. We are also having maternity photos done this weekend.

Dear Emilee,

Dear Miss Emilee,

Today we have your make up 3d/4d ultrasound. I would really appreciate if you could show us your face so we can get some really cute pictures. But more importantly, I would prefer that you just be head down. It's getting so close to my due date that I worry more and more that you won't be head down before you get too big and can't move anymore. Being head down and in position would make Mommy and Daddy so much happier, so if you could just do that for us today, we would be very very appreciative. Even if you still don't want to give us any pictures of us, just be head down. Thanks!!

29w5d - Dr's appointment

I had my doctor's appointment with the "brother" doctor yesterday. First, I passed my glucose test (YAHOO). There's one stressor off my back. The office was CRAZY busy. I think they have some office training this week so their appointments were limited and they had all 3 doctors in yesterday. There was a point when all the seats were taken and some people had to sit on the floor. It was cute though cuz all the husbands were offering their seats to the pregnant ladies.

So then we met the doctor. The appointment itself went great. Good weight gain - I think I only gained a pound or two. My belly measured right on. Heartbeat sounded good. Then we showed him our birth plan. Basically he said that my OB, Dr. S will approve it and then he will go along with it. He did look over it and didn't really have any objections. David thought he seemed kind of put off by the fact that I was going natural, but he didn't say anything about it. I also expressed my concern about her being breech. He did attempt to feel where she was and said he couldn't tell, which is weird since Dr. S always seems to be able to tell. But he said about 15% of babies are breech at 30 weeks and only 1-3% go on to be breech at birth. So my chances are good.

I also talked to my neighbor Julie and she made me feel better because I'm pretty sure she is flipping back and forth which makes me think she has the potential for being head down, she just needs to get there and stay there (and quit making Mommy a nervous wreck). I'm going to keep up with my pelvic rocks and hopefully things will work out.

29w5d Elective Ultrasound

We had our elective 3d/4d ultrasound on Sunday. It did not go as well as we thought it would. I was so excited to see her again and to see her "chunkier" than before. I was excited that Noah would be there too.

So we get there and right away, the ultrasound tech is like "oh looks like she is breech". WHAT?!?!?!?! She isn't supposed to be breech, she is supposed to be head down just like she was at my last doctor's appointment.

Ok, so she moves on and it turns out she is what they call "Frank Breech" which means her legs are up by her face in a pike position. That means that when she would switch to the 4d view, all you could see was her feet and hands, no face. She did give it a good try, even had me stand up and walk for a minute to get her to move, but she wasn't budging.

In the end, we got a DVD of our 30 minute session and a CD of pictures (which I couldn't even tell you what's on there since I haven't looked at it). Not only is it disappointing that we didn't get ANY face shots, but then like David was saying, she should have just stayed in "2d" and gotten movement there. Instead she kept switching back and forth to see what she could get, which was nothing. So I feel like we just paid $175 for nothing.

Luckily, she did say we could come back on Wednesday to see if we could get some better shots. She made it sound like even if we could, it wouldn't be a full 30 minute session. So we'll have to even see if she is going to cooperate on Wednesday.

At this point, I don't think I would ever do an elective ultrasound again. It just wasn't worth it.

Noah was being really cute though. He would come sit on the bed with me and poke my belly and say "Move" to get her to try and move. I don't know if he really understood what he was trying to do, but he thought it was fun. Then we went to Babies R Us and bought the stroller frame that we will use with her carseat. Noah loved pushing it around and he kept saying "sister" and "emmy". I hope he stays this excited about her even after she arrives.

The rest of the weekend was somewhat depressing. I was most upset by the fact that she is breech. I kept using the fetal doppler to detect her heartbeat and use that as a way to determine where she is. It seemed like later last night, the heartbeat was a lot lower and I couldn't feel her head jabbing into my ribs like before, so I think maybe she had moved back down, but it's so hard to tell.

We also watched a little more than half of the "More Business of Being Born" videos. So awesome and so glad I bought them. I would highly recommend them to anyone who is ever considering having a baby and even those that are completely done, it will just open your eyes to all kinds of things I'm sure you didn't know.

The most interesting things I've learned is that the maternal mortality rate and infant mortality rate have both increased substantially in the last 30 years, right along with the C-section rate. The C-section rate has gone up from about 7% in the 1970s to 32.7% in 2009. The increase is due to several reasons (too many interventions, convenience, doctors who are just knife happy). I think most people would think that maternal mortality rates are linked to that in the sense that they die when they are being cut open, but it's actually the future of the mother that is more in danger. They can die from infection, scar tissue problems, etc, but one of the biggest causes of death in the future was something called "amniotic embolism", where basically the amniotic fluid goes back in the mother's system and she has an allergic attack and her heart and lungs just shut down, with no warning. Ina May Gaskin made a quilt as a "tribute" to all these mothers who have died through childbirth or related to childbirth and I was shocked how many of them were linked back to C-section. It's just sad and to think how many of those could have been prevented.

The other issue was infant mortality rate. I forgot the statistic but it was astounding how much more likely an infant was to die in the first month of life after a C-section birth than a vaginal birth. The MD talking about it suggested that it was linked to the amniotic fluid in the lungs. When the baby is in the womb, they are practicing breathing with the lungs with the amniotic fluid, so when they are being born, they have fluid in their lungs, they are supposed to. The difference is that when they are born by vaginal birth, the "squeeze" through the pelvis and cervix pushes out all the fluid from the lungs. Also called the "fetal heimlech maneuver". David got to see it on Noah. Even then, he still had some fluid left in his sinuses that had to removed, but otherwise, he didn't have to be suctioned or anything. However, in a C-section, that never happens and it's up to the doctors/nurses to get it all out. Sometimes they do, or sometimes they think they do. This doctor explained that if some is still left in there, that they can develop infections or essentially drown from it. Again, very scary.

My end comment. Sometimes C-sections are needed. I don't doubt that there are certainly infants and mothers out there that 200 years ago would have died without a C-section, but I think they are way overused today and the result is actually more death in both mothers and infants. If you ask me how you should avoid a C-section, it's to avoid interventions. Your body knows how to have a baby. If you start adding drugs, pitocin, artificial hormones, and restricting how it can move/labor, then you are messing with the process and many times the baby and the mother's body doesn't like it and will react with erratic heartbeats, high blood pressure, etc and then at that point, a C-section is needed.

Above all else, go watch the movie and do your research.

Last doctor's appointment and Doula

So my last doctor's appointment went well. I did tell him about my chiropractor appointments and he didn't necessarily say anything about them. He didn't sound like he personally "believes" that he can help but he said if it seemed to be helping me, then I should keep going.

I had a 7 pound weight gain, which is definitely more than 1 pound a week, but seeing that I'm way less than I was with Noah even at birth and that I wasn't gaining (actually losing) weight in the beginning, it's no big deal. I also attribute that to the last 4 weeks including the Holidays, where I may have indulged a bit.

The biggest news was that as I was scheduling out all the rest of my appointments, I found out that my regular OB is going to be on vacation the week she is due!! I couldn't believe it.

I had done all this work to prepare for Noah's birth and my dr seemed so supportive of our natural birth plans and when it came down to it, he was supportive. So while I was still nervous about this birth because every birth can be different, I was feeling a little less anxious than the first time. But then I find out that there's a good chance he won't be there and I feel like I'm back to square one again.

So the plan is to see his "associates" for my next 2 appointments, which I think is routine anyway just in case he wouldn't be "on-call" when I go into labor, but now even more important. I have met with the female doctor before, but never really "quizzed" her on her supportiveness of natural childbirth. This time, I plan to take our birth plan and really get a good idea of how these doctors feel. Hopefully they don't feel that much different than my regular OB and all will be well. Not to mention, we still have the chance that she can come early or late and my regular OB will be there. They say due dates are actually week 38-42, so that's 4 whole weeks she is due and my OB will be gone only one of those weeks, giving me a 75% chance of delivering with my regular OB (although I would think the greatest chance she will come would be that one week...but who knows except baby, right)?

This also leads me to our other birthing decision David and I have made - to hire a doula. We didn't really think about this much the first time around. I think we were on a "birthing" high from our Bradley classes and thought we could handle everything ourselves. Did we? Pretty much. I would say Noah's birth went pretty well. However, there were a few things I wished we had done differently and at the time, we were always unsure of what we were doing. This time, I think hiring a doula is a good decision so we have that second opinion, that second person to bounce ideas off of it, that second person to help David out when he has to use the restroom, update family, etc. And then when we found out our regular OB may not even be there, it just solidified our decision more.

So then the task of finding one... It turned out to be more difficult than I thought. It really irritates me that when you offer your services and someone contacts you, that you don't contact that person back within 24 hours. We have a rule at my work that we need to have an away message up explaining when you will get back to that person or you respond within 24 hours. With my Scentsy business, I have a personal rule that I always get back within 24 hours, but generally I respond within 15 minutes. I think I emailed about 10 doulas. One or two responded that they couldn't take me for that time frame, but one was like 6 days later. In the end, I only had 2 that responded at all, one within a reasonable time frame. I met with her first and she was fantastic. It really pushed us over the edge to hire a doula at all. The second one was good and we liked that she was actually a midwife in her main business, but I just think we didn't "click" with her as well. I'm sure she does great work though and I would recommend her to others. So now we are in the process of hiring the first one. I am really excited and can't wait for my prenatal appointments.

For those that aren't really sure what a doula does or includes, basically she is a support person during labor and birth. That's her main role. Our specific one will also do 2 prenatal appts where we will discuss our birth plan, my nutrition, what relaxation techniques we will use, etc. Then she will show up whenever we want her to once I'm in labor, most likely while I'm still at home. And will stay through the birth and make sure we have breastfeeding established. She will then visit us two times post birth to check up on us.

So that's what's been going on in our lives lately. I now start seeing the doctor (not necessarily my own...grrrr) every 2 weeks, so my next appointment is on Jan 23 (next Mon).

Tidbits

This post isn't really about any one thing, just lots of little things I want to share about our lives right now.

* Today is my glucose test. Not really looking forward to it. Technically, I'm predisposed to it because of the PCOS but I still take the Metformin, which I would think would help, but we'll see. I also have a regular doctor's appointment today and after today's appointment, I'll start going every 2 weeks. Just another reminder at how close to the end we are getting.

* Emilee may turn out to one crazy baby!! When Noah was born, I thought this was easy. Almost 2 years later, I still think he's a pretty easy kid (hence why we decided to go for another...hehe). I thought my pregnancy with him was "normal", but it turns out he was easy and laid back even in utero. I hardly ever felt him kick or move compared to Miss Emilee. She is all over the place, jabbing me with what I can guess is her elbows and knees. Not to mention all the over fun symptoms she has caused (longer morning sickness, pains in my back...see the last post). So I can imagine that once she is born, she is going to continue her reign of fun, which will make for 2 very tired parents. Wish us luck!! (But don't get me wrong, I'm so excited for her to arrive!!)

* Noah is almost 2...what!?!?! Seriously, how did that happen. Just yesterday, I was giving birth to him, and even more recently, having his first birthday party. How did another year pass us by? Noah is having a birthday party but this year, it's just going to be for his little friends and their parents. And of course, it will be train themed. Lots more posts and pictures to come regarding that.

* Other things Noah is doing is talking in 2+ word phrases. I never thought we would get here, but we are...finally. Most of the time, he still talks in 1 word phrases, but every so often, there is a "please" or a "mommy" or "daddy" in there too. Or he'll say "I got it" or "read it". The most amazing thing to me is his use of the correct tenses of words. It's not perfect, but seriously, when I can ask him what he's doing and he responds "reading" or "running", that is amazing to me. Not only is his language skills blooming, but his overall comprehension is good too. Of course, he still has his days when he just refuses to listen. And we are definitely doing more time-outs these days. But he really is a good kid and I can't wait to see what the next stage brings.

* One last Noah update is on his potty situation. We've always taken the approach that we will just wait and let him take the lead. And we certainly weren't pushing it before Emilee arrived. But we have always had a little potty chair out for him. And he started becoming much more interested in it. He tells us when he has gone "poo poo" and he also says "pee pee" or "potty" but I think more times than not, that just means he just went in his diaper. But we still take him to the potty. So far, if we put him on his little potty, he will most of the time go, but just a little, which makes me think he is forcing it. On the big potty, he likes to sit on it, but doesn't ever go. We also bought a little seat for the big potty, but again, still nothing there yet. I think it's really hard since we are both working and it's winter, so he's got a shirt, undershirt, pants, and diaper on and by the time you get all that off, it's exhausting! I think we'll just keep encouraging him and doing what we can and then maybe once she is born and we take a few weeks off when the weather is warmer, we will try a full-on potty training time with undies and everything. Are we crazy for attempting potty learning and having a newborn? Probably, but if Noah gets potty trained out of it, I'm willing to try!

* The only other interesting thing in our lives right now is we are trying to re-do an old rocking chair. We got this chair for $10 at a garage sale and it has an ottomon and everything. The only problems were that it was missing a few nuts, bolts, etc and it's ugly. We did use it in our living room until Noah came and needed more room. Now I'd like to put it back since we no longer have a "rocking" chair in there (we got new living room furniture). So we took it all apart and David is going to paint it black. My job is to take the cushions and make new covers. I think I can do most of it myself. I'll make sure and post pictures when we are done.

And 3rd trimester is here....

The whole time I was trying to conceive Noah, I just wanted to be pregnant. I would have done anything just to be pregnant, it didn't matter. And it happened. And I was so happy. Sure, I had a little morning sickness and some pains, but I was happy to be pregnant and having a child. I had Noah and moved on. Right around 12 months old, I started getting baby fever again. Slowly at first, but then I had it bad. We started fertility treatment and it just made it worse, but I had more hope this time. Luckily, we got pregnant pretty quickly and again I was thrilled that we were pregnant AGAIN.

But this time, way more morning sickness. It lasted until at least 12 or 13 weeks. It was all day sickness. And just when I thought I couldn't take anymore, my back and hip started hurting. I have since found out that that's due to a prior injury and the stresses of raising a toddler and being pregnant are just making it worse. I am still very happy to be pregnant, but man, this pregnancy is rough. I hate to complain, because I know SO many friends that are trying to conceive and haven't yet and would die to be in my position, but seriously, I'm having way more trouble this time around.

I am very thankful to be pregnant, really I am. But at this point, I'm just ready for the baby to be here. I've gone from having occasional hip pain (hopefully getting better with the chiropractor visits) to now having pains in my lower belly and upper back from just my ever growing belly/baby. I would sort of expect to feel this "immobile" about 2-3 weeks from delivering, but 13 more weeks!!! Guess I'll just hang on and hope it goes by quickly....